today's the day when i'm finally fed up.
today is the day when i finally cried over an injustice someone has done to me. because i did things out of caring and now i get screwed over, taken advantage for it, and that is the part that hurt the most.
today i can admit i am hurt.
today i can admit that i am capable of caring enough to be hurt.
those are big steps for me.
but i mentioned being finally fed up, and so today is a day of action. my rage is fueling me. it will keep me going. it will get results.
today i am finally on my side again. fuck anybody else. all this fucking worrying and worrying of other people's perceptions and impressions and whatnot. fuck ALL of that.
and that started with a dream i had last night. that the ONLY thing i can remember from that dream is the word "darling." i can't remember any images or anything. only that i said the word "darling" and now i find myself calling myself that again so effortlessly. this is how i nudged myself out of bed this morning: "it would be beneficial to wake up now, darling."
that's love.
but my images don't seem to be working and that SUCKS ASS!!
LJ