oh, man... i'm going to cry...
no ride to full moon party tonite.. and then.. i run into the guy who's gonna give me a ride home for thanksgiving.. first of all, i was struggling to talk to him 'cuz i was really dizzy and out of it.. he was saying how he was soo bored.. i think he asked me what i was gonna do.. so i told him i was gonna try to go to the full moon thing if i can get a ride.. he just kinda gave me a look and walked off.. i think he thought i was trying to mooch a ride off of him.. :/ i meant to clarify, 'no, wait. i wasn't trying to get a ride from you, if that's what you think.' but my brain was processing really slow and he disappeared before i got a chance. my brain is so slow right now.. it feels like molasses sloshing around up there.. actually, no. more like.. these things.. i have NO idea what to call them.. but they're like jelly inside and you have to be careful how you hold them or else they'll slip out of your hands.. i saw 'em at a gift shop in Tampa airport once..
anyways.. more reasons to cry.. i've been searching for hours trying to find a full-length video or audio of both aphex twin's "come to daddy" and the verve pipe's "the freshman" [don't look at me like that, it's just been in my head lately :p ]. Regarding the verve pipe.. i knew there was a reason i don't like to get rid of any of my cds.. there's only two from my cd collection that i've ever gotten rid of. one [seal], i've never really missed.. the second [verve pipe], i've never missed at all until now..
anyway. yeah. i can hear the loud thunderous cry in unison:
NAPSTER!!!
maybe one of these days i'll cave in.. ;)
*sigh* you have no idea how much this sentence can do to me: "i don't want to talk to you anymore." i can't help but take it personally, no matter what the dilemma is.. even if you say it's not me.. i have never in my life had anyone ever say that to me.. i don't know what to do with that.. maybe i deserve it, tho.. i AM kinda turning into a piece of shit human being.. heh..
and there's others reasons to cry.. 'not getting into those..
if i only had a car.. i'd, like.. go driving.. with my music blaring.. contributing more to the destruction of my ear drums.. ahh.. 'sounds like heaven.. :)
hmm.. happy thoughts.. 'gonna be visiting home for thanksgiving.. [hopefully, if the guy who was gonna give me a ride doesn't hate me.. heh..] I'll get to see my friends.. :) We're gonna do karaoke. :) Maybe I'll get to meet Sexy Tim [haha] I'll get to go driving again.. ahh.. [that is, if my parents let me.. hopefully they won't not let me 'cuz i haven't driven in awhile.. c'mon, man.. it's like riding a bike.. heh..] i really hope i'll get to chill with my brother while i'm up there.. just me an' him.. being apart made me realize how cool he is, i guess.. :) what else..? mm.. maybe i'll get to see dan.. for some closure in person..? how weird would that be, tho.. man.. man, man, man.. hopefully he'll come to the yearbook signing party an' i'll see him there..
how weird would that be...
uhh.. i have such an intoxicating exhaustion smothering me.. i haven't been able to kick it out of my head since i woke up at 4 this afternoon.. heh..
LJ