what would you do if i followed you..?
Reading a couple of old cards from the ex last night.. Specifically, a couple birthday cards from two years ago that I didn't get from him till after the mess-up, but that I got him to give to me anyway.. I think I have cold hard proof that we could have gone a lot further.
IF-and that's a big if- I hadn't messed things up.
What with, being insecure, nagging, pushing, and.. other things..
Not that any of that matters, really. Except that it is actually kind of comforting to know.. that we could have continued on..
"Comforting? Why aren't you falling into a depressive slump instead, like you normally do?"
Oh.. because I don't do that anymore. I don't really even know how to do that anymore, really.
*shrug*
He was a really cool guy, though.
..
"Love like you've never been hurt."
I wouldn't know how.
But maybe the focus shouldn't be falling in love. It hasn't been for me for a long time now.
I don't need to be in love..
And I think I can be okay with that. For a while, anyway.