Ooooo. Diaryland has a new look. 'Don't know when they did that.. 'Been a while since I bothered to come around here.. But this is nifty spiffy stuff.. pretty colors now.. all this profile stuff you can play around with.. Cool. I like this guy, Andrew. He's cool. Someone even has me listed as a "favourite" diary on here... I'm tickled. :)
But anyway. Hi. How's it going? Good, I hope. Yeah, that's great..
I remember I used to write such long ass letters to people. I used to have, like, 5 pen pals.. plus my friends and I would keep notebooks that we'd write back and forth in. Those notebooks got quite juicy...mmm.. 'specially the ones with Jennie. I loved writing letters. In handwriting. Long as can be. For a little while there, my ex and I would, like, compete to see who could write a longer letter. Or who could reply faster. I still have all those letters, too. Every. Single. One. I'm keeping them. Forever and ever and ever...
Anyway.. Now.. you're lucky if you can get a little email from me with 5 sentences in it. It's funny.. the things you stop caring about when you get older.. What do I care about these days..? Very little. If anything. It's sad, really. To stop caring. Sad. And dangerous. 'Cuz.. if I've got nothing to care about.. tell me.. why do I keep waking up in the morning, albeit very grudgingly? I don't know.. but I need to find a reason soon to stay awake.. 'cuz sleep is lookin' better and better these days.. And you can't get much done if you're sleeping all the time..
But anyway.. Valentine's Day is in two more days.. :(
Ahh.. Something to care about: I need a new job. Seriously. Especially if I want to accomplish what I want to do for the summer. And that is.. get an apartment. Ohhhmygod, it would be so great if I could accomplish that. I even have someone I can room with. Jackie. She's awesome. I love her. She's one of those people that can just give me energy. And it would be so great to actually live with someone I can talk to. Not that my roommate right now is that bad. But.. the most we really ever say to each other is: "Phone call for you." Heh.. *shrug* And at home.. I never really talked to my parents or my brother that much.. Tho, I wish I had talked to my brother more.. He's cool as shit. 'Love 'em. I really wanted to just talk to him when I went home one weekend.. I wanted to talk to him when he got back from Ybor.. just talk all morning.. that woulda been cool.. but.. my mom was up, waiting for him.. [he was late] ..and as soon as he got home, she took him away to his room to talk to him.. :(
But.. that was one of things that I looked forward to most with Dan. Having someone to come home to that I loved more than life.. and even better.. having someone to hold me as I fall asleep at night.. and the best.. having his beautiful face be the first thing I see in the morning.. Ha. "Twin bed." We, at one point, decided we were gonna get a twin bed, too.. that way we'd hafta sleep really close to each other. I liked that idea. And at times when I was down.. he would say to me: "twin bed." ..to cheer me up :) Now.. however.. I realize it's pretty impractical.. but it's still cute.. and it could work.. *shrug*
But.. it would be really really cool to have someone I can come home to that I can talk to and chill with and party with.. Ooo. Fun stuff. And the other thing.. I really can't go home for the summer.. Like, mentally, I can't handle it. I'll be fine for the first few days.. 'cuz I'll be out, having fun w/ my friends 'n stuff.. But after awhile, everything reminds me of Dan.. and I just become a mess. Down here, I can forget about him.. Well.. I don't forget about him.. But at least I can think of him without feeling such extreme loss..
LJ