Darling, your head's not right.."
*
I haven't updated lately, I know. There's a reason. It's because they cut off our DSL [not our fault, of course] and left us with dialup NetZero. Dialup really sucks from this apartment for some reason. Or maybe it's the NetZero. But we always had problems with dialup, whether it be NetZero, BellSouth, or AOL. The worst, though, is that with NetZero, I keep getting disconnected. So it's, after a while.. I really don't feel like bothering anymore..
Too much frustration to even try..
And I feel very defeated right now.. About many things.
I started at the library. Third day today. My thighs are very sore from squatting. Which is good. This job is not going to give me enough hours, though, so I still have to work two days at bp. Which means I'll be working six days a week now.
Which sucks..
Which.. I..
I just want to cry..
You don't understand. I can't explain it. It's everything. Everything that I can't tell anyone.
I just.. feel so alone..
And defeated..
I give in, O Cruel Fate.
I know I wasn't meant for happiness. But, once in a while, I still try..
Silly me.