I cleaned a lot today.
I even went so far as to get down on my hands and knees [I don't own a mop] to clean the kitchen floor.
But the sad part is knowing that all my hard-working efforts will soon be undermined by a certain male occupant.
And so I complain some more..
I really don't have anything of substance to say right now.
I've been feeling kind of better, emotionally, and more energetic lately. I don't know if it's because I enjoy my job now.. or.. my recent decision and realization to incorporate more protein into my diet. I took a look at what I eat lately and I saw that all I eat is carbohydrate after carbohydrate after carbohydrate. Pasta, pasta, pasta, potato chips, bread.. mostly pasta. But.. maybe a fruit or vegetable once a week, at most. And a piece of meat or some ground turkey when we could afford it.
But.. then I remembered something I used to eat often at my grandparents' house. Tuna with cottage cheese. Sounds gross, right? It's not, really. There's a helluva lot of protein in a can of tuna, and some protein in the cottage cheese to add, and not even half of the calories, fat, and carbohydrates that mayo would have, if you were to make some kind of tuna salad sandwich or something. So it's a smart snack, I think.
Or dinner.
We'll see how this approach works out for me.
I've been a lot more at peace with myself lately. And, again, I don't know if it's the added nutrient of protein, or the job. Or both. But.. I've been taking a clearer look at my surroundings. Driving around Colonial Drive these past few days, I've been starting to see the same Colonial Drive that first time I drove through Orlando, when we were looking around for apartments 'n stuff, see what's around. When Orlando was new, a place of hope and new experiences and growth. It looks very different than the clouded-over-with-disgust Colonial Drive that I had gotten used to.
But I do that sometimes. I take an extremely familiar, often tiresome, surrounding, and I try to adjust my eyes and my brain so that I could see it as if for the first time again. Similarly, I used to walk around the house back home and try to imagine what the place would look like through a stranger's eyes, seeing it for the first time.
Things can look very different, depending on your brain state. Or, like, adjusting all the associations you've made with certain surroundings.
Y'know?
But.. my hatred for Orlando has actually started to lessen. And I'm actually a little sad to be leaving now, especially when I just started this job that I like a lot. And.. Hunbun.. has actually become more tolerable.
But maybe it's his cologne. I'm like an animal that reacts to certain scents sometimes. When he wears cheap generic stuff, I usually don't like him much. But when he wears his Burberry Touch.. mmm.. I can't get enough of him. Burberry Touch is the scent that I would relish in my comforter and sheets after nights that he had previously slept over... But.. he's just about out of the Burberry, and recently, he brought back from home his Calvin Klein's Contradiction. And that scent.. has been putting my inner self on friendlier terms with him.
It seems crazy.. that my reaction could be so primal, but.. hell, I don't know what to think of it.
That something as simple as a scent could make that much of a difference..
*shrug*
The Simpsons are on now. And I think I'll have a frozen banana [my new substitute for my craving for ice cream. and a solution to my bananas getting rotten before I get a chance to eat them.].
So, uh.. yeah.
Didn't really have anything to say, anyway.
LJ