Today began with a big blow-up. I had to say "hello" to Friday hearing yelling and insults in the other room and threats of having to leave.
It all began because Mr.A had a doctor's appointment today. Lady L, the mom, decided not to pay for him, after already saying that she would, previously. Well, Mr. A had no money because he already coughed up everything he had to her for rent and whatever else she felt like charging him for. [Seriously. She'll come home and tell him she picked up a calzone for him for dinner. And then she says, "That'll be 8 bucks." And god forbid if he drinks one of her sodas.] So she tells him, "If you're not going to the doctor, then you're not staying here."
Huh?
Can you tell this woman really does not want him living here?
First, it was "You can't stay if you don't go back to school." So he goes back to school. Which also meant quitting his very good full-time job. After going back to school, she wants to charge him more for rent.
Huh??
It's like all these stupid Catch-22's with her.. [Did I use that term right..?] Damned if you do, Damned if you don't. Either way you turn, something else is gonna bite.
Or something like that.
But it was a lot of yelling. I was still lying in my fold-out chair foam bed thingie. Trying to squeeze in a few more minutes/hours of sleep. But no such luck.
It was awful, really. I hate hearing that shit. One thing after the other, yell, yell, yell. The laundry, the dishes, the money. He tells her to shut up, and that she's crazy. Not very smart if you want to keep a place to live. Lady L yells for Lou, the dad, the mediator. Now Mr. A has two people telling him he's acting like a 15-yr-old.
Something happens, and Mr. A says, "Goodbye, goodbye, I'm leaving."
I'm feeling traumatized by all this. Inside my head, I'm making plans. An email to my accounting instructor:
Due to some very serious family problems, I have been forced to move and will not be able to attend class for the rest of the semester. Could I possibly get an Incomplete? Do I have any other options? Please advise.
I was trying to figure out how many of my boxes I could fit in my car.. I was wishing I had a van. Then I was wondering about how much a U-Haul truck would cost. But I would never be able to drive one of those..
Probably a big reason why I'm a fucking scared little rabbit these days is because I am threatened with the possibility of having no where to live every other day.
Seriously.
One thing or the other. "Goodbye." "I'm leaving." "Leave now, get out of my house."
The frequency of words like that start to eat at you and make you feel really fucking uncomfortable, unstable, and unsafe.
*shrug*
But what can I fucking do?
It was "worked out," though. I'm still here. More than ever, I want to keep avoiding his parents. Do whatever I can to stay out of their hair. I told Lady L, when she asked, that I was going to the Laundromat. Our wet clothes were pulled out of the machine so that she could do hers. Rather than aggravate her more, or have my wet clothes sitting there, I decided to just dry them at the fucking Laundromat. But she was like, "Oh, that's silly! I'll put them in when the clothes in the dryer are done."
I was like, whatever..
That lady, though, she scares me. Especially when she talks. Like she has a permanent frog in her throat.
What a wonderful way to start the day. Needless to say, I was feeling very down and shaken by all this. Shit, I'm still traumatized by my own mother yelling at me.. And now I gotta hear other people's mothers yelling at them..?
I wanted to leave, regardless of whether Mr. A was staying or not. But I have only two weeks left of this semester. If I can only hold out for that long.. *sigh*
I had to find a way to comfort myself. And I couldn't have chocolate. Day 2 of Atkins, and I haven't slipped yet. Oh, how I wanted a Starbucks caramel frap, though... Instead, I bought myself two little mini gift books at Barnes & Noble. With uplifting and inspiring quotes about life and hardships. I love those little gift books. And a girl's gotta comfort herself somehow..
LJ